As humans it is our birth right to be happy and joyous and no one can take it from us. The interesting thing is that we are ourselves the main impediment to living a happy and fulfilled life. Over the years, we have formed some beliefs and engraved then into our mind as truths. Whereas all these beliefs are mere fallacies. If we are to live to our maximum then watch out the following barriers to our own happiness.
a. Happiness Is Something External
Believe me or not Happiness has nothing to do at all, with the external circumstances. It is totally in our control. It is in our mind. It is not the situation itself but the reaction to the situation that makes us unhappy.
b. Happiness Is Near To Impossible in Today ‘s Stressful World
People say, after all, stress is here to stay and if we want to live in this world, we have to encounter stress in one form or the other. The answer to this is: it is us which makes a situation stressful or otherwise. It is in our control. Birds, animals and plants also live in the same world. Have you seen a sparrow in stress, a cat in tension, a tortoise in distress? Never! Actually there is no stress in the world! Sounds weird? But it is THE FACT. Let me quote here one of my favorite authors Dr. Wayne Dyer. He says “There is no stress in this world, only people thinking stressful thoughts”. What a price less quotation! Just read it again and again and let it settle deeply into your heart and soul. Just observe the power of these words. Next time whenever you start feeling anxious or stressful or worried, just repeat the above words slowly and let them take root in your heart. I have not said mind purposely because mind is the cause of all this stress.
c. Happiness Is Found In Some Achievement
This is also one of the thoughts our mind repeats to us almost incessantly until we are convinced that we can only be happy if we have achieved something great or if we are immensely successful at this or that skill or field. Actually, the converse of it holds true. Remember this and keep it written somewhere where you are able to see it often. YOU DO NOT GET HAPPY BY ACHIEVING SUCCESS, YOU ACHIEVE SUCCESS BY GETTING HAPPY.
d. Happiness is in Future-I Will Be Happy When…
This is also one of the major misconceptions and keeps billions of people un happy throughout their lives. The internal dialogue within us is something like this: I will be happy when I get a promotion, when my daughter gets married, when I am selected as one of the top 10 performers, when this bad weather is over, when economy is stable, when my dream of world tour materializes, when the boo I am writing gets completed, when I am able to meet my ideal person, when I hit a jackpot etc. etc. and the list goes on and on and on. It is endless. What does this mean? It is called postponing happiness to the future. This is all nonsense. We can only be happy in the present moment. Past is gone and future is in no body’s control. So why not enjoy each and every moment of the present. If we are not happy NOW, we cannot be happy in the future.
e. Unhappiness is Natural State Of Humans
Another mayor delusion which we all have within our mind is that it is OK and natural to be unhappy. After all there is so much to be handled by an adult in day to day circumstances, how can one remain happy? Only children can be happy because they have nothing to do except enjoying their lives. Here lies the point; when a child can be happy without status, possessions, achievements, awards, then why can’t we be? The answer to the questions raised above is that first of all we have to train our mind that our Natural state is Happiness and not Unhappiness. It is the conditioning done by our society, our culture and our environment to our minds which makes us believe that happiness is some elusive concept- unable to achieve in this practical world. So from now onwards challenge this well-established view and say repeatedly to yourself that HAPPINESS IS THE NATURAL WAY OF LIVING OF ALL HUMAN BEINGS.
f. Happiness Needs Some Special Skill
Believe me, to achieve happiness you do not need to be intelligent or bright or even literate for that matter. You do not have to be sharp or clever or smart. The only thing you need is commitment -a solid commitment with yourself. If you are really committed that you will remain happy for the rest of your life, come what may, then YOU WILL REMAIN HAPPY and if you just want to be happy or you are just thinking to be happy then it won’t work. A strong commitment is what is required and nothing else.
In short, to paraphrase what has been written above, happiness is totally in your own control and it only depends on how committed you are to achieve it.